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June 23, 2005

Top U.S. General Reminds The Fair-weather Patriots Why We Are In Iraq

Excellent story in the Washington Times today regarding the situation in Iraq and the value and importance of our mission there.

The top U.S. operational commander in Iraq warned yesterday against an emerging "complacency" among Americans who now question whether the two-year war in Iraq "is worth it."

"The United States has not been attacked again since 11 September. And so there's some questioning, perhaps, of whether or not what's going on here is worth it," said Lt. Gen. John R. Vines, who commands the Multinational Corps Iraq. "Quite honestly, I think we have a pretty clear-cut choice. We either deal with terrorism and this extremism abroad, or we deal with it when it comes to us, as it would inevitably, as it has previously."

This is definitely worth reading.

The Washington Times

H/T to Conservative Punk

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 12:36 PM | Comments (3)

Deep Thoughts

Consider These 3 Deep Thoughts

(1) Zero Gravity

When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ball-point pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat this problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion developing a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside-down, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to over 300 C.

The Russians used a pencil. Your taxes are due again--enjoy paying them.

(2) Our Constitution

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it's worked for over 200 years and heck, we're not using it anymore.

(3) Ten Commandments

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a Courthouse is that you cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians! It creates a hostile work environment.

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 07:51 AM | Comments (1)

June 22, 2005

Ever Consider Recruiting

In the past few years the Air Force has had to involuntarily re-train numerous people into the recruiting service. I simply can't understand why. My friend sent me three good reasons to be a recruiter. What do you think?

So are you ready to volunteer for recruiting?

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 08:24 AM | Comments (3)

June 21, 2005

DILLIGAF

Any idea what the title means?

Ever had a day like this? A day when the "Give A Fuck-o-Meter" is just bottomed out.

DILLIGAF??? Do I Look Like I Give A Fuck??

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 05:27 PM | Comments (2)

June 20, 2005

Do You Need A Harley

On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of which loved to play together. One day the two were playing, when the horse fell into a bog and began to sink. scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chicken to go get the farmer for help!

Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but to no avail, for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Running around, the chicken spied the farmer's new Harley. Discovering the keys in the ignition, the chicken sped off with a length of rope hoping he still had time to save his friend's life.

Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see the chicken arrive on the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold of the loop of rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end to the rear bumper of the farmer's bike, the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of the powerful bike, rescued the horse! Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to the farmhouse, and the farmer was none the wiser when he returned.

The friendship between the two animals was cemented: Best Buddies, Best Pals. A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit, and soon, he too, began to sink and cried out to the horse to save his life! The horse thought a moment, walked over, and straddled the large puddle. Looking underneath, he told the chicken to grab his penis and he would then lift him out of the pit. The chicken got a good grip, and the horse pulled him up and out, saving his life.

The moral of the story?

When You're Hung Like A Horse, You Don't Need A Harley To Pick Up Chicks!"

So do you need a Harley?

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 10:44 AM | Comments (1)

Children Learn What They Live

I got this joke from an Air Force Reserve Combat Arms Instructor...

Here’s a truly heartwarming story about the bond formed between a little girl and some construction workers that makes you believe that we CAN make a difference when we give a child the gift of our time...

A young family moved into a house, next door to a vacant lot.

One day a construction crew turned up to start building a house on the empty lot. The young family's 5-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door and spent much of each day observing the workers. Eventually the construction crew, all of them diamonds-in-the-rough, more or less adopted her as a kind of project mascot. They chatted with her, let her sit with them while they had coffee and lunch breaks, and gave her little jobs to do here and there to make her feel important. At the end of their first week they even presented her with a pay envelope containing a couple of dollars.

The little girl took this home to her mother who said all the appropriate words of admiration and suggested that they take the two dollar "pay" she had received to the bank the next day to start a savings account. When they got to the bank, the teller was equally impressed and asked the little girl how she had come by her very own pay check at such a young age. The girl proudly replied "I worked last week with the crew building the house next door to us." "My goodness gracious," said the teller, "and will you be working on the house again next week, too?" The little girl replied, "I will if those assholes at the Home Depot ever deliver the fucking sheet rock"....

Kind of brings a tear to the eye doesn't it?

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 08:05 AM | Comments (2)

June 19, 2005

Happy Fathers Day

To all of you deserving Dad's I'd like to say....

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!!!!!!!!!

I'd like to extend a special Happy F-Day to my own Father and Grandfather.

While I'm at it… Happy Father's Day to all of my Uncles and friends as well.

To all of you dead beat Dad's who haven't seen or spoken to your children in years... Shame on you... Grow a pair and be the Father that your children need and deserve.

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 06:59 AM | Comments (1)

June 15, 2005

Promotion Results

Today I got wonderful news...

Yours truly has been selected for promotion to the rank of Technical Sergeant or E-6.

For those of you who aren't familiar with the rank structure in the Air Force this is what the various Technical Sergeant stripes looks like:

Dress Blues Uniform

Battle Dress Uniform

Desert Camouflage Uniform

This is the same rank as an Army Staff Sergeant, a Marine Corps Staff Sergeant, and a Navy Petty Officer First Class.

Unfortunately promotions in the Air Force aren't instant or same day. Once selected we receive a "line" number and are promoted according to that number. My line number is 5236. I will most likely sew on my new stripe sometime after the first of the New Year.

I'd also like to extend a huge congratulations to all who "made it" this year be it E-6 or any promotion!! To those who pounded a few beers for "passover" just remember study hard and the promotions will come.

I just thought I'd share the wonderful news.

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 06:20 PM | Comments (18)

June 11, 2005

Re-Enter The Parking Garage (A Second Look At A Fan Favorite)

Things have been very busy lately. Once in a while life happens and sometimes it happens with a vengeance. Try as I might I haven't been able to sit down and write much lately, so I thought I'd re-run a fan favorite. Enjoy! -- SlagleRock

A few nights ago (This actually happened in July '04) two friends and I decided to do the tourist thing. We decided to go downtown, see the river walk and have some genuine Mexican food. So, we did just that. We parked in an underground parking garage near the mall on the river walk and strolled up and down memory lane. We BS'd about the first time we all got to go off base after basic training and how funny that was. The three of us had a great meal and a few beers at one of the tiny Mexican restaurants on the river. As our evening wound down we headed back to the car.

We got in the car and started to back out of the parking spot when all of a sudden a little white car slammed on the brakes directly behind us, preventing us from backing out. Immediately three males (teens to early twenties) jumped out of the car and ran up to the drivers side of my friends car.

As they were approaching, my buddy (we'll call him Bruce for this story, you'll see why in a minute LMAO) jumped out of the car, and I hopped out as well.

Initially the three individuals didn't even acknowledge Bruce. The littlest one of the bunch started calling us everything from "crackers" to "bitches." He immediately addressed my second friend (we'll call him Pappy) who remained in the back seat. Now being cops (at least the two of us who had nuts enough to get out of the car) we did what we are trained to do: we tried to diffuse the situation. In the mean time, I was slowly making my way around these three thugs unnoticed.

The little thug we'll call Stupid (and again you'll see why) leans down and looks at Pappy and says, "What did you say bitch?" Pappy says, "Dude what are you talking about?" Stupid says "You flipped me off and called me a fag when we drove by, Bitch!" Now in reality even if Pappy would have done something like this (which he did not) those thugs never would have been able to see him as Bruce's car windows are tinted jet black.

Bruce steps forward a little and says, "Hey, you guys take off, this dude didn't say anything to you, we were talking to each other in the car so I don't know what you think you saw."

So long story short, Stupid and Pappy continue to yell back and forth for several minutes.

Finally Stupid tells Pappy, "You are getting your ass beat bitch, either you can get out here and take a beat down or I am coming in there! Better yet, how much money you got bitch, maybe we'll just take all you bitches money." Oh and yes, chicken shit Pappy is still in his seat with his seatbelt on.

So Pappy says one last time, "Just go away I didn't say shit to you."

About that time Stupid made his move and started towards the car door. Bruce steps between them and says, "You aren't getting anywhere near my fucking car or my friend"

Now unbeknownst to me as well as these three thugs, old Bruce is a Black Belt in three different martial arts. As Stupid is moving in, Bruce jumps straight up in the air and snap kicks this little thug under the chin so hard his head flips back like a Pez dispenser.

As soon as it all started I made my move. I grabbed the biggest of the three from behind in a standard choke hold. Once I had better control, I turned him around and adjusted my hold so that I was crushing his windpipe. Immediately after I grabbed the big Mongo looking fucker, the third thug started toward me. Mongo started gurgling get back, "Get back! This dude is going to break my neck." So turns out they had a chicken shit in their group too, or at least they do for now. The third punk stepped back towards their car and watched as Bruce proceeded to beat the ever living shit out of his mouthy little friend, Stupid.

I held the big guy in a death grip so he couldn't move. Every time he attempted to free himself I proceeded to tenderize his ribs with several ferocious punches.

While we were standing there my friend Bruce looked like a hurricane of arms and legs, he was spinning and kicking/punching this little thug all over the place. At one point I think he even helped him up so he could spin kick him again.

After what seemed like hours of scuffling, Mongo dropped like a lead weight, and I thought I had killed him. When Mongo dropped, the third guy must have got his second wind. He started at me like a bull. Without hesitation I kicked him in the balls so hard he could have worn his manhood as earrings. As he started to double over, I knuckle punched him in the throat. He hit the ground next to Mongo like a ton of bricks.

After a second or two, thug #3 gets back up and starts running towards the car. To my relief Mongo came to (he just passed out) and ran to the car as well. They drove off and left their mouthy little friend to the wolves.

Now we clearly have the upper hand so I go over and pull Bruce off of Stupid. This little thug looked like Rocky after his fight with Apollo Creed. This kid's face looked like 20 lbs. of ground beef. He was barely conscious. About the time I pull Bruce off a cop rolled up. He immediately cuffed the little thug. We thought it odd that he didn't cuff us, but it turns out that someone had called the cops and told them we were getting car jacked. On his way up to our level he could also see a little of what was going on as he looked diagonally through the garage.

Three hours later, several statements and hospitalization for all three of the "hard asses" we were let go. No bail, no notifications to the base (thank god) and no arrests for the three of us.

It turned out that this had happened several times in the past few weeks to people who were parked in that same area (blind spot to the security cameras). These thugs were deliberately targeting people with out of state plates, starting a fight and then stealing whatever they could.

In the process of giving our statements, the cops asked Pappy where he was during all of this. He said, "I just froze, I don't know why, but I froze."

The cop responded with, "It was a good thing you hang out with Bruce Lee and Hulk Hogan or this could have been very bad for you."

Pappy actually caught a lot of shit from the cops for leaving us hanging, but in hind sight it was funny as hell. Those three thought they were going to get paid. Instead they got hospitalized and arrested. The big guy had a sprained neck and broken ribs. The little guy had a broken nose and lost a couple of teeth, and their friend knows exactly what his testicles taste like.

Moral of the story, you never know what you might get into, and starting a fight with complete strangers can clearly come back to bite you in the ass.

That's one for the good guys.

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 10:55 PM | Comments (2)

June 03, 2005

They Call It "Fight Or Flight" For A Reason

H/T to Delftsman and Mamamontezz for pointing me to this story....

According to The Salt Lake Tribune:

CONCEALED WEAPONS: Firearms do not make people 'nice' Living in fear Not having been present at the episode, and lacking any legal determinations, we will not presume to judge the behavior of one well-known and well-armed computer entrepreneur and that of a group of people gathered to express extreme displeasure with his motoring habits. We are, however, prepared to evaluate the philosophy the impossible-to-embarrass "Super Dell" Schanze employed to justify using a gun, or at least reference to a gun, to deter hostile people during said confrontation. Bunk. Dangerous, potentially deadly, bunk. Apparently threatened by a man with a rock - a rock aimed not at Schanze or his child, but at his luxury car - Schanze is alleged to have produced a previously, and legally, concealed Glock 10 mm in self-defense. Well, auto-defense, anyway. If that's what happened, Schanze faces both a misdemeanor charge and the loss of his concealed-weapon permit. An outspoken advocate of the right to keep and bear arms, even when exhibiting behavior that would not be acceptable in any well-regulated militia, Schanze denies committing a crime but was happy to describe the change in attitude that his little friend elicited among his antagonists. "They decided to be really nice once they knew I was armed," he said. "Their whole personality changed. It was amazing." Amazing? Amazing that people will change their behavior when the alternative may well be sudden death? Seems pretty predictable to us. Of course the whole point of the free coinage of concealed-weapons permits in Utah - there are some 62,000 of them out there - is that a heavily armed populace is a well-behaved populace. Maybe. But people who think they may be shot are not being "nice." They are afraid. Some of them ought to be afraid, as they might otherwise commit some sort of mayhem. But the majority of us do not want or deserve to live in fear, threatened by someone whose concealed-weapons permit is one traffic accident or domestic quarrel away from being among the some 200 a year that are revoked for criminal, sometimes violent, behavior. Some people, who carry large sums of money or have specific reasons to feel endangered, may be safer if they are armed. The rest of us are not.

OK, so what did we get from this editorial? First, where are the facts? This story is clearly written from the liberal/anti-gun standpoint where the author wants to depict Mr. Schanze as a gun toting, trigger happy, "right-wing nut job".

I can't say whether or not Mr. Schanze felt like his life was in danger or if the life of his child was threatened, but what I can say is it is clear that he was outnumbered and the crowd was not friendly. All it may have taken to incite a riot that he couldn't have stopped or contained would have been one word, one punch or one throw of the rock. It doesn't sound like he pointed it at anyone just showed that he had it and would defend himself and his family.

Fear, I absolutely hope the crowd felt fear. That is exactly the reaction that is needed to make someone second guess whether or not they want to attempt to harm you or your loved ones.

The Salt Lake Tribune should be embarrassed for publishing this tripe. You will notice that there is no authors name on this article. Probably for a reason!

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 05:08 PM | Comments (5)

June 01, 2005

What No Child Molestation Or Prisoner Torture, These Stories Can't Be Worth Reporting...

Kim Du Toit has a couple of stories you won't likely see in the lame stream media. There are no rock stars fondling little boys, or terrible pictures of Abu Ghraib, there is nothing to pin on the military or our President except Kudos.

Take a second, hop on over read the stories and let me know what you think.

lagleRock Out!

Posted by SlagleRock at 02:45 PM | Comments (3)